And again....

Ok, so I didn't stick with it and didn't do it...again.  But today I started again because last night I stepped on the scales and weighed more than I ever have before.  Today I stuck with it.  Today I counted servings in each food category instead of counting calories.  I had 5 servings of bread, 3veggies, 2 fruits, 1 Protein, 2 milk.  I also drank more water...especially in the afternoon when I felt hungry.  It was really, really challenging...but I did it.  Coming home this evening from volleyball I really wanted something else to eat, but I didn't do it.  I feel hungry but I feel proud of myself.  Now, I just need to do it again tomorrow.  One day at a time.  Usually by the third day I'm done trying.  This time I hope to make it to a week and be rewarded with progress (a smaller number on the scales).

Well...not off to a good start, yet

Man, I was really feeling it, I was so inspired to change my lifestyle, so motivated that I started a blog.  Well, that was Wednesday.  What happened on Thursday?  Life.  After a long day at work, I went grocery shopping with my two younger kids.  Well, by the time we were finished it was 6 and we were famished.  Hello, drive thru window.  Mama's too tired to cook and we're hungry now.  Hello Taco Bell.  I got a chicken grilled stuffed burrito and ate it on the way home with a large pepsi.  When I get home it's time to unload the groceries, put them away and then get the kids started on homework, baths and finally bedtime.  So that thirty minutes of exercise?  Does battling my way through aisle after aisle for an hour at the grocery count, cause that's as close to exercise as I got. 
Today is Friday, another tiring day.  Another afternoon of running.  I did cook supper tonight and made a Mexican style lasagna and I didn't eat that much of it, but I didn't fulfill my goal of more veggies with this meal. 
So tomorrow is Saturday.  My goal tomorrow is to start the day with an excercise DVD and begin a food journal that I can carry with me.  I have to buckle down and try to put myself first.  I have lots of cleaning to do tomorrow which should keep me busy, plus I promised the girls I would take them shopping.  I vow to avoid all drive thrus while in town tomorrow!!
I think my lesson here is that I need to start a routine and be very strict with myself.  Not sure what to do about that wiped out feeling I have after a day's work.  I just wanna come home and nap!
Hoping for a better start tomorrow:)

The beginning...

On Nov 28th I will turn 39 years old.  There was a time when I couldn't imagine turning thirty, now I am on the eve of looking at forty.  My sisters like to tease me, my children are constantly making old remarks, but to tell the truth, I'm not that bothered by the number.  What bothers me the most are the limitations I've put on myself from bad choices that I've made. 
Lately, I've been looking back at my life in the form of decades.  My twenties...ah, yes, I remember you.  So carefree, so naive, but also always in such a hurry to be grown up.  Marriage, baby, college...it was not always easy, but I always had the energy to keep up and still make my life fulfilling in the process.  My husband and I were laying the foundations for our life together. This is the decade I had my girls, the decade I dressed them in lacy dresses and ruffly socks and shiny black shoes!  This is the decade that my girlfriends from high school would still get together and catch a movie and dinner every few months.  This is the decade where we were looking for adventures.
My thirties...a time of change.  So many friends and family have left me during this decade.  At 31, I lost my dear friend who was also my Mamaw.  We talked everyday on the phone.  She died seventeen days before my son was born.  Also, during this time many of my friends started losing their parents.  It was so painful to watch their sorrow, but loss also made my faith in God stronger.  I committed myself to church and at 34 my soul was saved by a merciful God.  Our own family was completed when of our son was born.  We bought a parcel of land and now dream of the day we can build a bigger house for our family. 
So now, here comes forty.  I would like to think that this will be a decade of stabalization.  Financially preparing for retirement while paying for our children to go through college.  Mostly, I want to undo some of those bad choices I've made.  So right now, I want to make my family healthier and before I turn forty I want to drop all my excess weight.  It sounds trivial, but during that decade of change, I didn't change the way I ate.  I ate like I had the metabolism of a twenty year old, but I wasn't nearly as active.  Put it all together and I'm entering my fourth decade of life needing to lose a lot of weight.  So much so, I don't want to put a number on it.  So for right now, I will post a picture of myself now.  My goal for now is that this time next year, there will be a new picture, one that reflects a healthy diet and lifestyle.  There are so many limitations I have right now.  I want to meet 40 being strong so that I will be prepared for what life brings and also so I can go looking for adventures again! 
My plan for this week is to exercise 30 mins per day.  Food wise, I want to increase veggies and cut out all fried foods (yep we hit the drive thru---a lot).  Wish me luck, part of me really doesn't want to commit, but a bigger part of me wants the old me back again:)